even more of your drag questions answered!

Hello Kittens:

It’s that time again. It seems I’m quickly becoming the net’s leading authority on drag shows. Well, what can I say, there are a part of my weekly life, whether I’m in drag or just clapping for my fellow (giggle) queens.

You have lots and lots (and lots and lots) of question about drag, so let’s get right to it. And make sure to watch out in this edition for some of the completely random/horrifying drag questions that bring people to my website!

Pluck it, tuck it, werk.

1. why does a man become a drag queen

‘Cos it’s awesome. ‘Cos lady clothes are fun. Because performing is exhilarating.

Assuming you’re amenable to the idea of drag, you look at it one of two ways: 1) wow, that’s so great, but I could never do that, or 2) wow, that’s so great, and I want a piece of that. People who get into drag obviously fall into the latter category.

A lot of people, even a lot of gay people, assume there’s some sort of ‘pathology’ behind wanting to do drag. It’s really just another art form, one that uses gender expression as its medium, and paints in all the colors of the MAC rainbow. It is a fun thing to do that other people find entertaining. Win-win, end of story.

2. i’m fat and i wear a wig

me too!

3. how to attend a drag show

Step 1: find a drag show.
Step 2: go to it.

I don’t mean to be flip. It’s just to say that the only way to go to a drag show is to do it. If you’d like to be the best-informed audience member you can be, please read my handy-dandy guide, “So you’re going to your first drag show.”

4. how to have fun at a drag show

Step 1: go to a drag show
Step 2: have fun at it

Again, not to be flip, but you just have to do it. Trust me, if you go to a drag show and don’t have a good time, you’re probably either an asshole or immune to fun. Which is to say: the fun will happen, you just have to sit there and let it wash over you. Hoot, stomp, clap, tip, and please drink responsibly.

5. are drag shows for gay men

Drag shows are for the people who show up. Back in the day, there were lots and lots of drag shows at straight night clubs and supper clubs.

Like showgirls, but with full-coverage foundation.

Drag shows are not exclusively by or for any one group of people. There are for people who want to have fun playing in the sandbox of gender.

6. worried boyfriend may like drag queens

Unfortunately I don’t have more info about this person’s situation. It’s not often I think of relationship advice as gender specific, but I guess this would be one of those rare cases.

So I’m just going to assume whoever typed that is a concerned straight girl.

First off, what do you mean by like? Like, as in enjoys the spectacle of drag queens? Because that’s the whole point. There aren’t too many hard and fast rules about drag, and most of them were made to be broken, but a pretty solid rule is that drag queens should damn well be entertaining. If your boyfriend likes drag queens in the thinks we’re awesome kind of way, he’s like most other people with an open mind and a sense of humor.

Or you could mean the other kind of like. Maybe your boyfriend is attracted to drag queens, and maybe he’s not. He’s the only one who knows that, and it couldn’t hurt to ask him. But let me say this: I distinctly remember my grandfather ogling RuPaul in 1993. He thought she was a woman, even if she was a bit “leggy.” I myself from time to time find my head turning towards a pretty young female-identified drag king. Being turned on by a person who is presenting as a gender you’re attracted to, even if they aren’t actually that gender, isn’t weird.

And if your boyfriend is still attracted to you? Then you probably have nothing to worry about.

7. if someone is a drag queen do you ask them about their

Nope. Probably not.

I’m kind of sad this question got cut off, but the answer is probably no. Unless it’s about something really superficial, like clothes or makeup. Otherwise, it’s probably none of your damn business. Rule of thumb: ask yourself if you would ask that question of a stranger if they weren’t a drag queen. If you wouldn’t, you shouldn’t.

8. high heels fucking machine

Don’t wanna know.

9. sweet butt drag queen in prison

See #8.

10. can you make money as a drag queen?

Yes. Can you make enough money to pay your bills? Realistically, there are probably fewer drag queens than you think who don’t have some other job, too. If you like eating on a regular basis, I wouldn’t quit your day job until drag is actually your night job.

11. gay depilation

Is there a difference? WHY HAVEN’T I BEEN TOLD?

Yo, we all remove hair the same way. Drag queens just have more to remove.

  • exfoliate
  • wet the face with lots of hot water for 30 seconds
  • apply a good shaving cream (not something that comes out of an aerosol can!) and use a fresh razor
  • rinse the face with cold water and use a good aftershave product
  • moisturize

12. how to tape yourself like a fat drag queen

I’m going to hope you mean this.

13. how do u have a drag qween friend

Be nice to a drag queen. Strike up a conversation. Be cordial and interesting. But please don’t collect a drag queen as a friend just because she’s a drag queen.

(…and maybe learn how to spell queen. NO T, NO SHADE!)

14. what’s wrong with going to a drag show?

Absolutely nothing.

All right, kittens, that’s it for another round of your drag questions! I like doing this! And trust me, I have a backlog of questions to answer, so if I haven’t gotten to your question yet, stay tuned!

LOVE,
Big Mama Schlomo

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2 thoughts on “even more of your drag questions answered!

  1. hey girl I just recently moved to Europe and haven’t been to a drag show here yet (but I’m definitely planning on going soon!) I’m usually a very generous tipper but I’m fucking confused about how to tip in Euro? Because over here we only have €1 and €2 coins and tipping in coins sounds awful. I mean I’ll definitely be tipping with €5 bills but this bitch is broke. Any advice? Mwah!

    • Hi there! This is a really interesting question, and one to which I sadly don’t have an answer! I think your best bet is to go to a drag show and see how people tip. Who knows, maybe queens in Europe have figured out a way to work with coins? I’m sorry I can’t be more helpful, but please feel free to share what you learn if you go to a show. Thanks!

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